Justify This!

I dare you!

Stuff like this makes me mad. Really mad. Who are the ignorant scumbags (which is really quite insulting to actual bags filled with scum) who encourage this?!

Eating disorders (EDs) are life-threatening and should not be taken lightly. They should not be encouraged. However, there are some people who seem to insist on helping these kids kill themselves. Do they just hate girls? Are they actually AWARE of the behavior they're encouraging?

The site mentioned in the article I linked to, bluedragonfly.org, is the website of one such person. This site talks much of "reaching perfection," and names of the posters on the message board include "iwannawasteaway" and "stringbean." The message boards have 5'5 girls talking about their "goal weight," and longing for their weight to be back in double digits. In fact, one girl gave her "stats," and they were as follows:

Height: 5'9

Highest Weight: 135 (sadly that's at the low end of "normal" for my height...you think I just might have a problem?)

Lowest Weight: 95 (glory days, but kind of painful)

Current weight: 104.2 (after bouncing up to a wretched 120 this summer...don't know what happened there, blech!)

Goal Weight: good question...99? Pretty much to keep going down (of course we all know we'll never be satisfied so why have goal weights?)

It seems as though many of these girls know that what they're doing is unhealthy, but they claim to like the feeling of control they get when they haven't eaten in a long time. A website like bluedragonfly.org could be very beneficial for people like this. Unfortunately, it just festers.

I felt sick when I read the following exchange:

So far so good...only 100 cals i have eaten.5 hours left til bed time...I have to stay strong...food is my enemy.I think I am going to exerscise again around 8:30ish.How is everyone else's day going? Anyone struggeling out there like myself...IT SUCKS!!!!!!!!I wish I had a button so u could control your weight instead of food.How unrealistic do I sound...I'm having a hard time right now cuz I want some chocolate....Ok I am done rambiling on....-Kim

its that hard time of day i know im fasting and really hungary but i dont care food is the enemy.my parents are eating chineseright now im just smoking ciggs and staying away stay strong u can do it -disgusted

Here's another quote you might like (read: be appalled by):

"I've freed myself from this compulsion of eating. When I wake, I am empty, light, light-headed; I like to stay this way, free and pure, light on my feet, traveling light. For me, food's only interest lies in how little I need, how strong I am, how well I can resist-each time achieving another small victory of the will: one carrot instead of two, half a cracker, no more peas. Each gain makes me stronger, purer, larger in my exercise of power, until eventually I see no reason to eat at all"

So this is what our friendly little "support group" is perpetuating. Just reading through the message boards, I started to get hunger pains. Throughout the conversations, the girls can be seen talking about things like trying to stop purging. Unfortunately, the only advice they give each other is to simply not eat, as this eliminates the need to purge. Obviously, this support group does not support *anorexics*, it supports *anorexia*. And the lovely bluedragonfly is the one responsible for this board.

Now that we've seen what this site actually does, let's see what it claims to do.

I, nor this site, are trying to help anyone kill themselves. I have said before, will always believe, and always say whether I recover on not - Anorexia Nervosa is a mental disease that reflects an imperfection in the make up of your ability to process emotion and stimulus [yes, I made that up, it's not regurgitated pap-speak from some Cosmo, like haters use.]

Lots of pretty words, no substance whatsoever. Whether what you said was right, wrong, or pure psychobabble, your website can't back up your claims. If posters on your message board talk about their "goal weight" and speak about how "food is my enemy" without reproof, then your site is a failure. If you continue to justify your site, then you yourself are a failure.

Another quote from the site:

This site is for support: We pat each other on the backs for our successes [as they are successes to us] and hug each other for our failures. We support each other through the rough patches and demand that you take care of yourself when another is in danger.

Successes to you? Do you know what success is for an anorexic? Losing more weight. You're not helping anyone solve their problem by patting them on the back for an achievement that they were driven to by their problem! I thought you weren't here to help anyone kill themselves, and yet you're rewarding people for things that can KILL THEM, you stupid....

We have a way of being able to bare our souls to each other because we don't need to hide the most basic part of our mental makeup. It is a starting point: we all know where each other are coming from, we don't need to explain that, and we can trust each other more than anyone else in our worlds.

Wonderful that you can "bare your souls" to each other. Really, it's very nice, we all need to be able to do that once in a while. But the simple fact is that you're not fixing anything that way. If I'm a POW and I have my hands tied behind my back, it doesn't matter how many of my tied-up comrades I show my hands to; they can't help me. So what can we do? Generally it's a good idea to find someone who's not in the same hole you're in, and get them to give you a hand up.

Here's another excerpt:

It's a support group in the best sense of the phrase: You're not okay, and that's okay. You can come here and try to find a bit of comfort in knowing that you're not alone, won't be judged and no one is going to tell you to fix yourself. You'll do that on your own when you're ready. And we will support you in that decision as well.

A support group? This begs the question, WHAT THE CRAP ARE YOU SUPPORTING? "No one is going to tell you to fix yourself." I'm sick. Tell someone with a life-threatening problem that they don't have a problem, and the problem WON'T GET FIXED! It's not like you're supporting the dressing habits of someone who wears different clothes; you're telling someone who could KILL HERSELF that she doesn't have a problem!

No one is telling the anorexic girls that they're stupid; no one's judging them. My heart goes out to them! I have the utmost sympathy for them; they've been lied to by a culture that places sex appeal and a skewed view of perfection on an absurdly high pedastal.

Anorexia appears to be a complex problem. I've not studied it in great detail, but I don't believe there is one generic reason for it. Desire for attention, actual or imagined struggles with weight, peer pressure, or desire for control or "perfection" can all be factors in the onset and perpetuation of an eating disorder. It, in my opinion, is a serious problem that requires a serious solution, and merely grouping a bunch of people with this problem together on one message board will not help cure it. Selling bracelets to help people's problems become part of their identity will not help matters either.

Who does bluedragonfly think she's fooling? Anyone can see the intent of her site and others like it, because actions speak louder than words. Whatever deceitful crap the mission statement may spew, the results of this website are quite harmful, perpetuating the starvation of America's youth.

Can bluedragonfly and others like her see the blood on their hands? Do they understand that they're making things worse for a group of people with a dire health problem? May God have mercy on their souls.